Gripes

We all know what it's like to be annoyed by little things that ourhusband, wife or partner does - leaving the cap off thetoothpaste tube, leaving the toilet lid up, leaving dirty clotheson the floor - and we know how easily these little grievancesof everyday life can spin out of control. In this brilliant newbook the sociologist Jean-Claude Kaufmann shows us how and whysparks can suddenly fly even in the most well-adjusted couples. They see themselves as being in total harmony but they aremistaken The clash between their uniquely individual attitudes tolife rumbles on in silence until suddenly erupting in emotionaloutbursts each time an object or an attitude reveals for thethousandth time the unbearable and incomprehensible otherness ofthe partner. When this occurs, a whole panoply of tactics is deployed, ranging from the combative (secret acts of revenge) through theneutral (sulking) to the subtly loving. But these stormy episodeswithin relationships can have a happy ending, for it is throughlearning to overcome these irritations and aggravations that loveis ultimately strengthened.